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Disobedience to Parents

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Ethics
مکارم اخلاق.jpg


Moral Verses
Ifk VersesAl-Ukhuwwa VerseAl-It'am VerseAl-Naba' VerseNajwa VerseVerse of Trusts


Moral Hadiths
Hadith of qurb al-nawafilHadith Makarim al-akhlaqHadith of Mi'rajHadith Junud al-'Aql wa l-Jahl


Moral Virtues
HumilityContentmentGenerosityControlling AngerTruthfulnessHilm (forbearance)AsceticismBraveryChastityInsaf (Equity) • Silat al-Rahim


Moral Vices
HubrisGreedEnvyLieBackbitingNamima (Talebearing)MiserlinessDisobedience to Parents'Ujb (self-conceit)Sum'aCutting blood relationSpreading grave sinsIngratitudeHypocrisy


Moral Terminologies
Jihad with the selfSelf-accusing soulAmmara soulSoul at peaceSelf-reckoningSelf-observationMusharataSinMorality lessonsImperceptibility


Scholars of Ethics
Muhammad Mahdi NaraqiAhmad al-NaraqiSayyid 'Ali Qadi Tabataba'iSayyid Rida Baha' al-DiniSayyid 'Abd al-Husayn DastghaybMuhammad Taqi Bahjat


References of Ethics

Qur'anNahj al-balaghaMisbah al-shari'a wa miftah al-haqiqaMakarim al-AkhlaqAl-Mahajja al-bayda' fi tahdhib al-ahya'Tanbih al-khawatir wa nuzhat al-nawazirJami' al-sa'adatMi'raj al-sa'adaAl-Muraqabat

Disobedience to Parents or 'Āqq al-Wālidayn (Arabic: عاق الوالدین) or 'Uqūq al-Wālidayn (Arabic: عقوق الوالدین) is among greater sins and moral vices referring to any form of annoying father and mother or either of them by tongue or action. In hadiths, looking them angrily, disrespecting them or saying "uff" ("Fie", an expression of frustration) to them are mentioned among the examples of "disobedience to parents". It is also mentioned that if there were any expression of disgust less than "uff", God would prohibit that too. Also, deprivation of the paradise, entering the hell, punishment of the grave, not accepting the prayers and not fulfillment of supplications are mentioned among the consequences of disobedience to parents ('Aqq al-walidayn). Some scholars of ethics mentioned shortness of life and intensity of the agony of death among the consequences of "disobedience to parents" in this world.

Meaning

Disobedience to parents ('Aqq al-walidayn) means when a child annoys his father or mother by his tongue or action.[1] However, the word "'uquq" has the meaning of "cutting off"; thus, in this usage, 'Aqq al-walidayn means cutting relationship with the parents.[2] Mulla Mahdi Naraqi mentioned disobedience to parents the worst form of cutting relationship with relatives and believed that whatever criticism applicable to cutting relationship with relatives, can also be applied to disobedience to parents ('Aqq al-walidayn). He also considers disobedience to parents among moral vices related with the faculties of anger and passion, which originates from hatred, anger or miserliness and excessive love of the world.[3]

Examples

Disobedience to parents refers to any form of annoying father and mother or either of them. In hadiths, angry look at them,[4] trampling their rights,[5] not fulfilling their requests, disobeying their orders and not respecting them[6] are considered examples of disobedience to parents. Mulla Ahmad Naraqi said that anything that annoys the parents is considered as "disobedience to parents" ('Aqq al-walidayn).[7] In a hadith from Imam al-Sadiq (a), saying "uff" to the parents, is considered the least example of disobedience to parents and it is said that if there were any expression of disgust less than "uff", God would prohibit that too.[8]

Consequences

Disobedience to parents ('Aqq al-walidayn) is among moral vices, which has been referred to as a greater sin in hadiths[9] and some consequences have been mentioned for it, such as the ones below:

  • Deprivation of the paradise and receiving its smell:[10] based on a hadith from Imam al-Sadiq (a), on the Judgement day, a veil from the veils of the paradise will be removed and its smell will reach any being at a distance of five hundred years, except to those who have been a subject of "disobedient of parents".[11] Also, in different hadiths, it is mentioned about such people that they will not enter the paradise.[12]
  • Not accepting the prayer: in a hadith, it is mentioned that a person who looks with enmity at his oppressive father and mother, God will not accept his prayer.[14]
  • Punishment in this world: in a hadith from the Prophet (s), "disobedience to parents" is considered among the sins, the committer of which will receive the punishment for it in this world.[16] Mulla Ahmad Naraqi said that it is seen that disobedience to parents bears shortness of life, bitterness of life, poverty, misery, agony of death and their intensity.[17]

Disobedience to Parents after their Death

According to some hadiths, disobedience to parents ('Aqq al-walidayn) would not happen only during the lifetime of the parents and may happen even after their deaths; the same way doing goodness to them is not limited to their lifetime. A person may be kind to his parents, but after deaths, becomes disobedient of parents; for example, because of not paying their debts or not asking God for their forgiveness. Also, a child may be disobedient of parents, but solves that after his parents' death.[19]

To release from disobedient of parents, Mulla Ahmda Naraqi reminds issues such as the troubles, sleeplessness and passions of the parents have for their child and also the fact of the fulfillment of a father's curse about his child.[20]

Notes

  1. Narāqī, Miʿrāj al-saʿāda, p. 532.
  2. Farāhīdī, al-ʿAyn, vol. 1, p. 63.
  3. Narāqī, Jāmiʿ al-saʿādāt, vol. 2, p. 262.
  4. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 349.
  5. Āmadī, Ghurar al-ḥikam, p. 671.
  6. Nūrī, Mustadrak al-wasāʾil, vol. 15, p. 194.
  7. Narāqī, Miʿrāj al-saʿāda, p. 532.
  8. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 349.
  9. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 276.
  10. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 349.
  11. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 349.
  12. Ḥimyarī, Qurb al-isnād, p. 82.
  13. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 348.
  14. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 349.
  15. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 448.
  16. Pāyanda, Nahj al-faṣāḥa, p. 165.
  17. Narāqī, Miʿrāj al-saʿāda, p. 532.
  18. Narāqī, Jāmiʿ al-saʿādāt, vol. 2, p. 263.
  19. Kulaynī, al-Kāfī, vol. 2, p. 163.
  20. Narāqī, Miʿrāj al-saʿāda, p. 532.

References

  • Āmadī, ʿAbd al-Wāḥid b. Muḥammad. Ghurar al-ḥikam wa durar al-kalim. Edited by Mahdī Rajāʾī. Qom: Dār al-Kutub al-Islāmī, 1410 AH.
  • Farāhīdī, Khalīl b. Aḥmad. Al-ʿAyn. Qom: Nashr-i Hijrat, 1409 AH.
  • Ḥimyarī, ʿAbd Allāh b. Aḥmad al-. Qurb al-isnād. Qom: Muʾassisat Āl al-Bayt, 1413 AH.
  • Kulaynī, Muḥammad b. Yaʿqūb al-. Al-Kāfī. Edited by ʿAlī Akbar Ghaffārī & Muḥammad Ākhūndī. Tehran: Dār al-Kutub al-Islāmīyya, 1407 AH.
  • Narāqī, Muḥammad Mahdī. Jāmiʿ al-saʿādāt. Qom: Muʾassisa0yi Maṭbūʿātī-yi Īrānīyān, 1383 AH.
  • Narāqī, Aḥmad b. Muḥammd Mahdī. Miʿrāj al-saʿāda. Tehran: Muʾssisa-yi Intishārāt Hijrat, 1378 Sh.
  • Nūrī, Ḥusayn b. Muḥammad Taqī. Mustadrak al-wasāʾil. Qom: Muʾassisat Āl al-Bayt, 1408 AH.
  • Pāyanda, Abū l-Qāsim. Nahj al-faṣāḥa. Tehran: Dānish, 1382 Sh.